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Friday, July 22, 2011

MY DOCTOR...


Let me tell you about my doctor.
He's very good!
If you tell him you want a second opinion,
He'll go out and come in again
~~~~~
He treated one woman for yellow jaundice for three years
Before he realized she was Chinese.
~~~~~
Another time, he gave a patient six months to live.
At the end of the six months, the patient hadn't paid his bill,
So, the doctor gave him another six months
~~~~~
While he was talking to me, his nurse came in and said,
"Doctor, there is a man here who thinks he's invisible."
The doctor said, "Tell him I can't see him."
~~~~~
Another time, a man came running in the office and yelled,
"Doctor, doctor! - my son just swallowed a roll of film!"
The doctor calmly replied, "Let's just wait and see what develops." 
~~~~~
One patient came in and said, "Doctor, I have a serious memory problem."
The doctor asked, "When did it start?"
The man replied, "When did what start?" 
~~~~~
I remember one time I told my doctor
I had a ringing in my ears. His advice: "Don't answer it." 
~~~~~
My doctor sure has his share of nut cases.
One said to him, "Doctor, I think I'm a bell."
The doctor gave him some pills and said, "Here, take these -
If they don't work, give me a ring."
~~~~~
Another guy told the doctor that he thought he was a deck of cards.
The doctor simply said, "Go sit over there. I'll deal with you later." 
~~~~~
When I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places,
He told me to stop going to those places.
~~~~~
You know, doctors can be so frustrating.
You wait a month and a half for an appointment,
Then he says, "I wish you had come to me sooner."
 

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